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...Und Die Vogel Singen Nicht Mehr

arg...i feel really weak right now. i can barely move at all. maybe cuz i only had four hours of sleep last night or not. or cuz that today and for the next ten days its gonna be hell cuz guess who's vacationing here for a while!!! fucking worthless prick...apparently his plane gets here in three hours. now children, lets all hold hands and pray it blows up! oh yeah i feel sooooooooo happy at the moment.

there's a part of me at the moment that just really wants to scream at the whole fucking world that i want to kill certain people and declare insanity to be locked away but i even don't feel like doing that really...i feel so shitty and i don't even know why..fuck i wish i had my old room..but at least i have headphones so i can listen to music and not be bothered...just not loud enough.

like i said up above..screaming sounds like such a good idea but it feels really hard at the moment to compress it all. hell i was so good at it when i was little why can't i do it now. i guess to explain of how i feel at the moment, i feel like that Dead Kennedys song, Riot..

"Rioting-the unbeatable high
Adrenalin shoots your nerves to the sky
Everyone knows this town is gonna blow
And it's all gonna blow right now:...

Now you can smash all the windows that you want
All you really need are some friends and a rock
Throwing a brick never felt so damn good
Smash more glass
Scream with a laugh
And wallow with the crowds
Watch them kicking peoples' ass

::skip verse::

Riot-the unbeatalbe high
Riot-shoots your nerves to the sky
Riot-playing into their hands
Tomorrow you're homeless
Tonight it's a blast

Get your kicks in quick
They're callin' the national guard
Now could be your only chance
To Torch a police car

Climb the roof, kick the siren in
And jump and yelp for joy
Quickly-dive back in the crowd
Slip away, now don't get caught

Let's loot the spiffy hi-fi store
Grab as much as you can hold
Pray your full arms don't fall off
Here comes the owner with a gun"

so on and so forth..besides of that being stuck in me head, i just feel like leaving for several hours into a pub, just sitting at the bar, stirring me drink in circles, listening to the beautiful heavy death metal being played out into the night, just being alone....but will that ever happen, hell no cuz i'm not 21 yet and i don't think Brian will have it....that and there are no decent pubs like that around here >_______>;;;

until then, i just sit here in the corner and not bother anyone with my presence.

1:35 p.m. - Friday, April 8, 2005

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Welcome Home

My Necrotic Regulus Lives Once More....

Fuck This Game

Who Would Of Thought Ne?

Happy Breaking From The Womb Day To Meh

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